What's In My Garden/Lungs?

Another visit to my dr. revealed that, best case scenario, I have Bronchitis. She also had me get an xray and some blood tests - if those turn up anything weird, I'll find out Monday. So, probably what happened is I got a bad cold, which turned into a sinus infection, which turned into Bronchitis, which, hopefully will turn into a beautiful flower and we'll all live happily ever after. After looking at some images of what my bronchial tubes look like, I now understand why I'm so GD tired all the time.

I've been so depressed over my current health state that I broke down and bought what might be described as a self-help book (although I noticed the section of the bookstore was labeled "Psychology.") There was, I'm not kidding you, a dude curled up in the corner of the "Psychology" section, weeping.

I know everyone's missing the "What's in My Garden" entries of last year. I never thought it would happen, but I can identify just about everything in the yard. I never thought I'd be the kind of annoying person that was all, "Look at my liatris!" And "My coleus just isn't doing well this season" but, it turns out I am. There are two mysteries outstanding, however:


This one grew out of nowhere and overshadowed my delphinium, which really annoys me. I think it's going to get the boot because it's just not wowing me and it's too big. Does anyone know what it is, though?

This vine-y thing grew right out of our compost pile - it reminds me of our cucumber, but the leaf is different. I wonder if a vegetable is going to start growing out of it. Anyone have any guesses what it might be?

whatveI, whatveI, whatveIdone to deserve this?

I'm going on now my third week of debilitating illness. My dr. told me it was a sinus infection, but after finishing my second round of antibios with little change, I have to wonder if that's correct. I'm going back to her tomorrow for another diagnosis. And more medicine.

Being sick like this again, aside from being a major pain in my ass, effing up my b-day month, getting in the way of my work and life in general, is really stressing me out. After The Great Crap-Up that was 2007, I get really anxious whenever I get sick because I don't want to go through all of that again. There's for sure no such thing as karma. I've figured that out.

Oh well.

Sweet Corn!

Over the weekend we had a rousing book club (with the biggest turn-out yet!) and then we went to M's Granny's house to celebrate his mom's 60th b-day! M's gran lives in a tiny town in Indiana where a local farmer plants a couple of rows of sweet corn for the community. She said you find the spot by "trial and error." I said, "What's the 'error'? A farmer chases you with a shotgun?" But, she never laughs at my jokes. We drove out and picked some corn and my boy fixed it up Grandma-style. Now we wait until the middle of winter to consume it and dream about these halcyon days. Camilla's magical recipe goes like this:
slice the corn off 16-20 ears. Melt one stick of butter in a heavy saucepan. Mix in corn with approx. 1 cup water. Cook for approx. 20 minutes. Cool and freeze. It's heavenly.

M's gran is a master of self-denial. Aside from telling us she had no intention of eating the tupelo honey we ordered for her because it was "too good to eat", she pulled out this never-before-used "amazing new invention" from around 1945. She told us it had been in her drawer for over 55 years, but she's never used it. M gave it a go with the corn (but it turns out he preferred to use a knife too!)

Birthday Month almost over (or is it?)

Oh, it's a tragedy - my Birthday Month is almost over and several weeks of it were positively ruined by this damn sinus infection! It was like being dead! I'm just going to cheat and celebrate my Birthday Month several weeks into August.

Well, I'm back at work but still feeling fairly awful. Got a terrible cough and occasionally feel faint.

In other news, my friends J&O gave birth to a little girl today. All are doing well and mazel tov to them. Can't wait to see the little thing, but probably need to clear up this cough first, lest I alarm. The good news: She and I will share a Birthday Month!

I was thinking about writing a long post called "Why I Will Not See the New X-Files Movie". Perhaps I will one day expand on the subject and publish it in a medium-sized book of Special-K wisdom including "Why I Became a Vegetarian" and "Good Reasons to Remain Child-free" and "The Correct Order to Layer Food Within a Taco" etc., but for now, I really need to go to bed.

*cough*

Oh, you won't believe it. Right after getting back from Vegas I've come down with a pretty bad cold. Aside from a few hours here and there, I haven't been able to work this week. I think I'm going to become one of those lunatics that never goes on a plane without a surgical face mask. I was pretty depressed to be sick on my b-day, but now I just hope to be well by this weekend. My cousin sent me this cute ecard that captures how I want to feel... My bike, my basket full of goodies and a cupcake on my head? Yes, please! Alas, in reality it's more like me, laying on the couch watching reruns of whatever's on the ol' DVR, surrounded by popsicle sticks. Today for fun I Facebooked everyone with my same name. That took up some time.

Lady Luck!

OMG! I won $140 more on Wheel! Of! Fortune! (and I only put $5 in!) I seriously tried to blow it on shoes and handbags, but I just didn't see anything that I really loved. Except for a pair of the most gorgeous Christian Louboutin shoes I've EVER seen, but (on SALE) they cost like $600 bucks. So, I'll have to win really big before I go back for those. Damn it. I just don't seem to have it in me to blow cash. And it's my birthday month and everything.

Wheel! Of! Fortune!

Oh. My. God. Guess what happened tonight? I met this nice woman at the conference, and she showed me how to play the Wheel of Fortune slot machine - and, so, I put in a dollar, and then I got a free spin, and then I got another free spin, and maybe another, and then - guess what? I won $130!

Then I almost bought a pair of Jimmy Choo's - but they didn't look right on my feet.

Now I'm sitting on my velvet couch, looking out at the lights and a black horizon, trying to fight an urge to go downstairs and play some more Wheel! of! Fortune!

Vegas, Baby!

Yesterday I arrived in Vegas and went straight to the conf. rooms to see the keynote speaker - Steve Wozniak. He told us what a genius he was and then ended with an odd string of "observations" about how girls don't raise their hands even when they know the answer and how hard it is to get school funding in California.

I'm staying in the most incredible hotel room - guess how many flat screen tvs there are! Guess! Three! And, my curtains are controlled by a remote. I thought it was going to be terrible, staying by myself, but I amused myself by raising and lowering the blinds for a while, watching a dvd on one of the tvs, and taking a nice soak in the tub.

Well, I'm off to sessions all day. Hopefully none of them are led by The Woz!

a tune

Found this really great short film/music video on It's Nice That. The song is so pretty, and the Fleet Foxes are nice enough to offer a free download on their myspace page.


White Winter Hymnal from Grandchildren on Vimeo.

Agoraphobia

Well, we had a beautiful weekend - saw Hellboy with a friend, and it was great (very post-Pan's Labyrinth but not as violent), hit the farmer's market on Sat. morning and scored some morel mushrooms for no less than - guess how much???? You'll never guess - $40/pound. We bought about a fourth of a pound, and then stretched it into two meals, one: whole wheat pasta with caramelized shallots and morels and two: good old fashioned, Indiana-style morels breaded with flour and fried in butter. Ain't nuthin' better, my friend. Why truffles get all the attention, I'll never understand. It's the morels that win the most coveted food award, in my book.

Today I went to the beach for a couple of hours. The water felt like it was approximately 50 degrees, but the beach was lovely.

Went on a longish bike-ride with M (culminating in home-made ice cream). Got mildly distressed due to aforementioned near-death misses. Came home in something of a tizz. Seems like every time I return to my house I feel as if I've cheated death. Have been asked before why my blog is called Agoraphobia - is not because I'm afraid of leaving the house - is more that I don't want to. If you don't mind me sharing just one of my many emotional quirks, whenever I go on a trip, I'm fairly certain that someone I hold dear to me (including myself) is bound to die a horrible death. One time I told my dr. if I might be agoraphobic and she said, "No... it's when you want to leave, but you can't, that you've got it." I suppose there must just be another term for not wanting to leave at all.

My Birthday Month

It's that special time of the year again when one and all gather together to celebrate the mumblemumble of our country and, more importantly, celebrate my Birthday Month. What's a Birthday Month, you ask? Why, it's just when you think to yourself: One lame day or evening isn't nearly enough time to celebrate my birthday! I'm going to celebrate all month long! And how does a person celebrate their Birthday Month, you may wonder? They just think: I shall gratify myself with any and all narcissistic whims that pop into my mind! Which, it turns out, are so far not that narcissistic or indulgent, at least in my case. So far.

Next week I am off to Las Vegas for a work conference. I'm not super-jazzed about it, because I'm going by myself and, even though I've been booked in a fancy hotel suite (a suite!) I'm going by myself, and I would have preferred to share it with a beloved husband, rather than slinking there alone after eating dinner alone or (worse) with a vendor. Oh well... I'll just have to find a way to turn it into a decadent, if solo, part of my Birthday Month.

For the Rocket's Red Glare

We went to Indiana for the 4th of July weekend to visit our families. My sister and nephew were visiting from CA and there were a few gatherings planned. It was wonderful to see my siblings and the new nephews, along with the rest of the familial unit. Young M. has a marvelous sense of humor and had us cracking up all the time. On the 4th, we went to my cousin C's house for a big bbq and a homespun fireworks display. My mom goes absolutely hysterical over any personal pyrotechnics and was putting herself in a right state dancing around trying to protect grandchildren from certain death, until, no longer able to control herself, she grabbed him out of my arms and fled. C also arranged a traditional family game of wiffleball, in which I was surprisingly tackled to the ground. Patriotic batter

My parents are under the mistaken impression that we chose to drive through holiday traffic to visit their house and not them. I know this because frequently when we go to visit they are not there when we arrive or leave us alone for long stretches of time while they attend events more interesting than the rare time we spend together. This time they blithely informed me that they would be leaving the second evening of our three night stay because they were going on their own vacation. Thanks, mom and dad! You really put the dis in dysfunctional family.

M and me holding the babies

(This is what everyone was doing behind the camera trying to make the babies smile!)

So, we have a couple of bold rabbits that hang around our yard; they don't even head for the hills when our cat is outside, but rather calmly continue to eat our cucumbers. (To be fair, the cat seems largely uninterested in chasing rabbits. But, we did find a headless mouse in the grass today. Could Kaya have done that?) I told long-time family friend Big J about the rabbit and he immediately started telling a tale about a "mad" rabbit SWIMMING after President Carter on a fishing boat. President Carter, he said, had to beat it off with an oar. I thought it was complete tomfoolery until I looked it up and found the most hilarious wikipedia entry of all time. I never should have doubted him!

The Girl Effect

When I was looking for a job, I made a lot of bargains with the universe, and it's about time I started paying them back. First, I promised to donate to public radio - I owe them big time. I'm really interested in micro-lending - there are a lot of reputable companies that help you do this. I just made a little donation to "Save the Children Empowering Girls in Bangladesh" through this really nifty site that's woman-centric: The Girl Effect!

Pondering

M and I had a great weekend, spending some time with friends, tending the garden (and the neighbor's garden - solved the problem of the overgrown weeds and trees by just cutting them down ourselves! [with permission]), getting a pedicure, and going on a long bike ride. We got all the way to Glencoe and stopped for a drink of water and a brief sit in a lovely gazebo when it propitiously began to thunderstorm. Later this summer we hope to take a two-day bike ride with an overnight B&B stay, somewhere between here and the Wisconsin border.

Today I saw more odd cell phone behavior at the Spa when a woman in the locker room deftly tucked her cell into the depths of her sports bra and then waltzed out for her workout. Do you think it was on vibrate?

Lately I've seen a fair number of people walking about in rainless weather with parasols. Today I pondered the question: Do those people deserve my scorn? Discuss.

Goings on

Today when I was at the gym Spa I saw two people talking on their cell phones as they worked out. Can you imagine? If I ever call a devoted reader whilst huffing away on the treadmill, I encourage you to hang up on me immediately.

I know fans of What's in My Garden? will be sorely disappointed to hear that we largely know what's in our garden now. It's finally shaping up to be the outdoor wonderland that we always imagined, however lacking in hot tub it may be. Soon I will post a picture of our rambling fence rose to prove my point. Now I am merely faced with the problem of wishing my neighbor would clean up their yard so that it doesn't mar the view. Does anyone have any tips on how to ask one's neighbor to weed and cut down trees that are growing out of the fence on their side?

We plan on being deep in tomatoes and basil before long, and you know what that means: bruschetta! Until then, we more than satisfy ourselves with this lovely crostini:

Slice baguette, smear with olive oil, and toast.

Roast beet (wrap in foil, throw in oven for about 30-45 mins), dice and mix with herb (I like oregano) and salt.

Spread toasted baguette with goat cheese. Spoon on beets. Wonder if tomato bruschetta's all that.

TGIT!

As if someone looked deep inside my soul and located my deepest desires, I've found two amazing things I've been looking for ... all my life, really. The first was just yesterday - a website that lists how people in different countries pronounce the sounds of animals (via Swissmiss). ie: we say "meow" for a cat, but in Japan they say, "nyan nyan". Then, today, what do I find but another websites that has sound bites of children from various counties prouncing what animals (and ambulances and race cars) say in their countries (via How about Orange).

I have a brilliant idea to make a coffee book about toilets around the world. That fascinates me even more than how people make animal sounds. Whenever I go on vacation and say, go on a tour of a super old house or a castle or something, all I'm really interested in is how they used the toilet. You probably are too, but you're too afraid to ask, aren't you? That's why my book is going to be a best-seller. Nobody steal my idea, ok? This is my Big Idea. Did you know, for example, that in Japan, apparently, bathrooms A. have heated toilets and B. have some kind of switch that turns on loud annoying music so no one can hear you tinkle? Isn't that FASCINATING? Anyway, the whole book's going to be like that.

Check out the new Top Five!

The Spa

I recently joined the gym - although, I call it The Spa, in order to make it more appealing to myself. It has a hot tub and a dry sauna, so it's it's not a terrible stretch. Tonight I went to a spinning class, for the first time in a loooooong time. It wasn't a great class, but it brought back a lot of spinning memories. I used to go back in the day, when we lived in San Francisco. I went to this class downtown that was really popular - so you had to get there early to get a bike. Probably there were 50-75 bikes (I think there were 6 people at this class tonight). It was really hard, but I loved it. The class was full of high-powered business women and these outrageously fit (in a way that only gay men from San Francisco seem to be fit) men. The music was awesome. The instructors were amazing (although one time, a guest instructor made my friend D cry, and that wasn't cool). Those classes were like, the only time in my life I ever felt that elusive exercise "high" that people talk about.

Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to my dear ol' dad (as he likes to call himself)! As my parents are becoming more and more web-savvy, I get such a kick seeing my dad's comments on my blog. He's my Dada Daddy, and I love him!
In non-father related news, M and I saw The Incredible Hulk last night. It was, naturally, much better than Ang Lee's 2002 version, which I gave the SMACK DOWN on my old website (I'm sure Lee still feels its bitter sting!) This new Hulk, played by Edward Norton and some CGI (which largely avoids the perils of the uncanny valley) has the sensitive Bruce Banner just trying to keep his heart rate low while he's plagued by the US military, who want to replicate him (or something.) Why can't they just leave Hulk in peace???? Hulk wonders. What's really bothered me in the past re: all things Hulk is the Physics of the Pants, whereby when Bruce becomes the Hulk, all his clothes but his pants split off, and when he turns back into a dude, what do you know? He's still got his pants. In this Hulk, they actually spend a good deal of time on pants physics, which I appreciate. What's the secret? Elastic.

Working for the weekend?

I had a thought on Tues, which was, "Oh my God, it's only TUESDAY?!" and then I got kind of stern with myself, and I said, "Self, we must learn to appreciate each day." I feel like I can get into a bad habit of considering days that I work sort of not-me days, then, what do I do but lose 5/7th of my life, right? Do other people have this problem?

M and I have been amusing ourselves this week by becoming ridiculously addicted to LOLCat. There seems to be something for everyone, even LoTR nerds (I mean, "fans"):

But this is the official favorite for our family:

In other cat and existential news, I encourage you to create a "Cat Lady", as I intend to do, and enter this contest with me.

Obama for President!

As you know, I was hoping Clinton would win the nomination, but, obviously, like her, I now throw my (considerable) support behind Obama. I never had anything against him, in fact I think he's pretty amazing, I just hoped that Clinton would win. I was depressed for a few days that we won't see a woman president just yet, and how misogynist the media coverage and reaction to HC was throughout her campaign. Also, after eight grueling years with the Bush administration, I was looking forward to some Clinton antics in the White House once more (Bill, all is forgiven!) I think we all missed out on something pretty amazing - I mean, Bill Clinton as the First Laddy would have been a treat.

I am excited, however, by the promise that Michelle Obama will be the most kick ass First Lady this country has ever seen (Suck it, Dolly Madison!) Don't you think so?

Springlessness

Woo! What a weekend! We saw tons of friends, celebrated my friend D's birthday, and today M and I went downtown to go to the annual Printer's Row Book Fair (where Augusten Burroughs was speaking - that jackhole owes me 14.99 and about 6 hours of my life back). So, we take the train downtown and the minute we step out onto the sidewalk, a torrential downpour commences.

I was talking with a friend the other day about how misleading the term "Global Warming" is - especially to those douchebag types that, over our very cold winter were all, "You call this Global Warming yuk yuk yuk" A better term, IMHO, is Global Weather Eff-Up, which is how I shall refer to it henceforth. I mean, you don't call a Plague of Locusts a Grasshopper Influx. Global Weather Eff-Up is the reason for that outrageously miserable winter, the reason it snowed that day in May, the reason we didn't have a spring, and went from wearing winter coats one day to to turning on the air conditioning the next.

So, anyway, it starts pouring down rain (which may or may not be attributable to the G.W.E-U), like you've never seen before, and we run back in the train station, which has glass walls all across the front, and outside we see these poor souls running around, like they're trying to outrun the cold in The Day After Tomorrow. So much for the outdoor book fair. We waited (a long time) for a slight break and then jumped in a cab and headed for the W Hotel and the bar.

I forgot to post this video I made for my friend D on his birth day - sorry this is a bit late!

Gal Pals

Saw Sex and the City the other night with some girl friends - was GREAT fun. Ladies, I gotta tell you, even though the movie's a little cheesy and the ending's not that great, if you have any love in your heart for the show, grab your best gal pals and head to the theatre. A huge part of the fun is sitting there with a couple hundred women, laughing at the funny parts and laughing harder at the cheesy parts, sneaking in cosmos, and figuring out who in your group is the Miranda and who's the Samantha.
(Our foursome looked almost just like that, except a couple of us where wearing zero-inch heels!)

Kelly likes to...

Have y'all heard about this Google game? You type "YerName likes to" in Google, then you laugh at the results. Here are mine:

Kelly likes to wear green unitards.

Kelly likes to super size everything she orders.

Kelly likes to steal bikes from random kids.

Kelly likes to be needed, as well as to cherish and protect her loved ones, of whom she is somewhat possessive.

Kelly likes to ride naked shotgun. (huh?)

Kelly likes to mix pleasure with business.

and my personal favorite:

Kelly likes to open the book of Proverbs and share its practical advice with others.

ps - check out the new Top Five!

Look out!

Just looking at a large body of water is relaxing, isn't it? I like to pretend Lake Michigan is the ocean sometimes. You can see the other side, and yesterday a lone surfer added to my illusion. This morning the lake was so beautiful. To paraphrase Forrest Gump, I couldn't tell where the earth ended and the sky began.

Riding my bike along the lake path is a great beginning and end to my work day, but sometimes it does get a bit stressful because I have to be careful not to, you know, get killed. Why oh why do people not use their turn signals? I'm sure the gentle Agoraphobia reader would never dream of not using their turn signals, but I have to wonder, just who are these reckless A-holes that threaten nearly every day to actually murder me?

I also spend a lot of time thinking about what kind of person pees on the toilet seat - another daily threat for which I must remain ever vigilant. I have to figure it's some kind of lunatic woman who crouches above the seat, peeing in a semi-circular fashion so as to cover the enter horse-shoe of the toilet seat in urine. She avoids germs, and yet, ironically, thinks nothing of leaving her own human waste for others to deal with.

We're all doomed.

High Street

M and I spent a romantic weekend in Galena - it's the only place outside of Chicago that seems to be worth going to in Illinois. It's a very unusual town for this area - it's built on a hill - the only hill in Ill., and there are old flood gates to guard the town from floods (or maybe drown them all, I'm not sure) and President Grant is from there, and some other president too, apparently, and there are tons of little touristy shops and ice cream parlors and whatnot.

We stayed at a faux Irish pub/hotel, but the drinks were fine...
Here we are on "High" Street - the top of the hill. Imagine you walk all the way up to your street and then you have to climb the stairs up to your house? Right? Oh, and we laughed for 10 years at the address 420 High Street. No kidding.

What's going on? (and I say ahey-a-a-a-a)

It's been a while since I rapped at ya, I know you've missed it, and I don't like it either. After a long day computering, I really don't want to spend all night on my laptop (or the phone, for that matter, if you have an outstanding unreturned phone call), but I'm missing out on some valuable online companionship. I finally broke down and got a Facebook account, and it turns out the whole world's over there on Facebook, doing God knows what. Half of my friends were like, Good lord, where have you been? And the other half said, Ha ha! Join us in the total destruction of mankind! Made me feel kind of ookie.

I did immediately find the old adage of Facebook being more "white collar" than the "blue" MySpace to be true, if judging only by the decreased number of former graduates from my high school who describe themselves as nothing more than "momma" and "Nascar fan" and claim to be "living it up in Florida" and post quizzes like What Kind of Chevy Should You be Rollin' in?

Anyway, I sort of hate MySpace and Friendster and Facebook because, for one thing, there's just going to be another one in a year or so, and then I'll have to sign up for that and remember a new username and password and put a new picture up and locate all my friends again and it's a major P.i.t.A. I relish the those days of yore when we just emailed each other, and were happy about it.

10,000 years!

Ha! Ha! I just saw this article that reads McCain Believes Iraq War can be Won by 2013! Hilarious! This is coming from McCain - Mr. "I don't think Americans are concerned if we're there for a hundred years or a thousand years or 10,000 years." Oh yeah? Well, I believe it can be won by the year 2015, why not vote for me as your next Republican president? Huh?

On Pants

Ever since low-rise pants became a la mode, I've had a heck of a time finding pants that fit. It's simple physics, really: If pants are designed to fit at the widest part of your body, then how are they meant to stay up? They can't, and that's physics. The problem got worse since I've returned to the work-a-day world and find it necessary to wear non-jammie pants. No longer cradled by draw-strings and elastic, I was left with little to hold up my pants but worthless zippers and buttons, because I don't like to wear a belt.

The problem is not just restricted to pants, but also low-rise underwear. Theoretically (I'm not saying this happened to ME) a pair of low-rise undies with loose elastic (technical term, "Quitters") grasping to the widest part of the body could slip down and be held up by nothing but the crotch of one's pants.* Like this:Imagine how uncomfortable that might be.

I don't like wearing a belt because it makes me feel like I'm being strangled and my internal organs are going to get all messed up, like Victorian ladies that had to wear corsets.

But, anywho, I started wearing a belt the last few days because the problem was getting way out of hand, and, while I feel strangled about the mid-section, I haven't had to hike my pants up at all. Who knew?

Anyone know where I can get some high-waisted pants?

*I just like saying "crotch".

Boneyard Prayer

Last night we saw Boneyard Prayer at Redmoon Theater with our friends J&R. The show had all of the elements that make Redmoon great - it was created in a collaborative process of artists, the set was beautiful and sparse, they used puppets, projected animation, amazing, original music, little/no dialogue, and their cool mechanics. The story was really depressing, which is why I wouldn't otherwise give it a glowing review.

Boneyard Prayer is about a hobo who returns to his wife after a long absence. They've lost a child, among other things. The set looks like the top of couple of railroad cars filled with dirt, which the hobos shovel all over the place during the show. It must be so uncomfortable to perform covered in dirt - dirt in your hair and socks all through a performance - can you imagine? Redmoon calls it a "folk opera" - and the music is stunning, very folks-y/ragtime-y kind of stuff. I don't know music very well, but I think everything was in minor key. Maybe? The lead actresses voice was gorgeous - beautiful tone.

Too bad it was such a downer - I mean, not a single laugh. Previous shows there have done a great job of mixing quite serious themes with a little levity, which I think would have been a nice balance. In the end, even though it was beautiful and artful and mournful, it didn't really give me any new insight, which I've really come to expect from that theatre group. At slightly over an hour it's plenty long enough - any more and we'd all be hitting the bottle, just like that puppet.

!Ole!

Snap! A certain husband just made his special 3-2-1 Margaritas! Now we're in Heaven. Listen, if you didn't know I was The Best Wife Ev-ah, I just bought a certain husband a Certain Video game on the way home. Now he'll be playing the latest Grand Theft Auto for hour upon hour, whilst I sit blissfully and wife-fully nearby, reading Misquoting Jesus and a new comic book, Last Man (or something), which is occupying most of my time these days.

Three-Two-ONE!
3 parts ta'kill'ya
2 parts triple sec or cointreau
1 part lime (freshly squeezed)

Know what else? This is my view from work - nice, huh? See that? That's The Lake. See that? That's the Sears' Tower, beeaaaatch!32132132131231231233212312321231232132212321!

Iron Man

Last night we saw Iron Man. M liked it, but I thought it was pretty stupid. But, I like Robert Downey Jr so much that I still had a lot of fun. That and I had a cocktail before the movie. Seems like a lot of people were questioning his super-hero-starring ability, but, despite being over-manscaped, he looked hot. I really liked the beginning, because I don't know from Iron Man, and his character was (to me) just some sort of rock star character in Afghanistan, joking around with soldiers. Then he has to wear some kind of dope-ass heart charger, and that's when things started getting stupid. The heart battery is apparently a major part of the conceit of the 1963 comic by Stan Lee, but I didn't think the translation to today was very elegant.

I lovelovelove Gweneth Paltrow in Shakespeare in Love and The Royal Tenenbaums, but after reviewing her filmography in imdb, I'm forced to admit that she's not the great actress I like to think she is. At the very least, she's made some really bad choices. Sad to report, she has zero chemistry with Downey Jr in this movie, and it ain't RDj's fault.

Ooo - just got Fur from Netflix with RDj and Nicole Kidman - more on that after I watch it!

Conveyances

I've started riding my bike to work, which has been both exhilarating and mildly terrifying, just on accounta I broke my arm a few years ago after I wandered into some bad karma and I'm desperate not to do that again. Did you know that the invention of the bicycle played an important part in the role of women's liberation? I think that's very interesting. Anywho, I feel quite liberated on my bike.
Lately I've seen this bizarre kind of skateboarding, only the skater in question has no board, just wheels under the shoes somehow. Like they sawed a skateboard in half. Has anyone else seen this? I've been trying to explain this phenomenon, but no one seems to believe me. But! I just looked up (online) proof (is that any kind of proof at all?) - turns out they're called freeline skates. To me it appears that the skater has neither increased speed nor increased coolness, so I can't really figure out what the advantage is. But, perhaps freeline skates will play an important role in something, who knows?

Weekend

Oh my goodness - the weekend has just flown by! Now that I'm workin' again the weekend is but precious time that slips through my fingers. The first few weeks at my new job were good - I think I'm going to like it there, long term. I was really exhausted because I got sick right away and was getting used to a new schedule and not wearing pajama bottoms all day, and that took a lot out of me. But, I think this week will be better.

Watched Michael Clayton and loved it - George Clooney just gets better and better, doesn't he? I thought the dialogue, and especially that opening monologue by Tom Wilkinson, was just amazing! It was like David Mamet wrote it! Aside from being a great story, I'm really interested in bio-engineered food and seeds, so I liked how that was the dirty underbelly. Another great source of info-tainment (I can't believe I just wrote that) about that stuff is Ruth Ozeki's book, All Over Creation.

We also installed a chandelier in our dining room - what a difference, huh?
Before - boring light one might see in one's grandmother's bathroom:
After, gorgeous light you want to host fabulous dinner parties beneath:I bought the light online - you can get them for much, MUCH cheaper than in a lighting store, and we also got one of those nifty ceiling medallions to give the room an extra architectural detail. Naturally, we used CFL bulbs - they're lately becoming available in dimmables.

Check out the new Top Five!

Weekend

My parents came to visit over the weekend to see a Cubs game with us - but we really lucked out because (once again!) they helped us with our out-of-control yard. Such digging and tilling and replanting you have never seen.

The Cubs game was fun - and ridiculously cold, even though we were experiencing a relative heat wave of mid-60s weather. The crowd was crazy, and we had a great time screaming and shouting and singing along with everyone. Here we all are:

You've got to head over to me da's (much ignored) blog for a very interesting story of his celebrity encounter!!

Update

I've started my new job and so far it's going really well. Wouldn't you know my second day I started to get an itch in my throat, yesterday I was really sick and today a little worse so I stayed home. Feel terrible about the bad timing, but what can you do? Anyway, aside from that, it's great, and I think I'm going to like it there. My boss is cool and into reducing and reusing like me, and told me about this nifty flash video called The Story of Stuff. Check it out!

Speaking of stuff - there was an article in yesterday's NYT about a study that indicates that money does buy happiness. I learned that back in the late 90s when I moved to San Francisco and started making a lot of money. It makes sense - people who have money most likely have well-paying jobs and therefore don't have to worry about stuff like rent and medical bills and various payments and food-on-the-table - things that make you insane when you don't have it. Of course, another thing I learned was that money buys stuff, and stuff, explicitly, does not buy happiness. Which (see how it all comes full circle?) is what that video gets to.

In other news, my parents are coming for a visit and a Cubs game this weekend and I hope to put them to work in our front garden, which is an absolute mess right now. Last week I practiced what I tagged Intuitive Gardening, where I just sort of followed my intuition with little to no actual gardening knowledge. We'll see what happens. I want to put more flowers in the garden this year, so I planted some seeds - I hope they come up.

UPDATE: I should mention, shoes don't count as stuff - they're simply marvelous things that have also been proven to buy happiness, just like money. (:

Movin' On

I'm about to (am I?) stop watching American Idol as mysteriously as I started watching it in the first place. Last night's "Idol Gives Back" was like an old fashioned variety show (and not in a good way). I can't help but find it ridiculous that the welfare of our world is in such dire straights, that even multi-million dollar corporations like Fox figure they've got to throw it a bone every now and then. I mean, is that how our government deals with crises of health and social welfare? Just wait for some self-serving company to take care of it?

Although, I did enjoy the performance of the great Annie Lennox very much.
In other news, I volunteered for the last time (hopefully not for ever) at the Art Institute yesterday. By some coincidence, I was listening to Selected Shorts by Symphony Space on my 'pod, when a story about a person who passed a long period of the Art Institute came on! He wandered the halls of the museum, imagining, hoping, to wake up in the luxury of some of his favorite paintings. It was called “Killing Time”, by Stuart DybekI really loved my work there, but, alas - I must go on. Before I left, I took a short walk to my favorite place in the museum (and Chicago), the Ando Gallery, where I've passed many a happy, peaceful moment.

6 more months, one less bag

Saw this great, easy crrrraft on Martha that just about anyone could make: a shopping bag from an old tshirt (everyone's got at least one of those!) A bag for every bag! That's my motto. I'm going to make one of these and see if I can jimmy it into an ICoE bag.

Here's another interesting looking crrraft - a diy silhouette. Cute, huh?via DesignSponge

You know who else is (nefariously) crafty? Bush and McCain. Check out this illuminating video by MoveOn.org:

Finally!

My friends, the unthinkable has happened and I am once again gainfully employed! I couldn't be happier. A long period of loneliness and couch-potato-ness comes to an end, and now I shall once again be a hard-working, disposable-income earning Special K of days gone by. I'm going to be working at the local university, as a "Training Specialist". I can't thank my good friend DeBordian Perruque enough, because he hipped me to the opening, then very kindly told glorious tales of my ability to multi-task, how well I work with others, and of my striking penmanship.
Me, on the way to my interview

Had a great weekend, celebrating my new job with friends, celebrating the b-day of the very sweet Sweethealoha, and today, mucking about in the garden, raking and rejoicing over the tiny buds that are finally sprouting up. The weather in Chicago was absolutely amazing this weekend, and everyone (including us) has been going crazy running around outside. Mostly we looked like grizzly bears emerging from our caves, grumpily rubbing the sleep from our eyes, unshaven, with twigs hanging in our hair, trying to find someone to feed us brunch at a sidewalk cafe.

Wanna see some cool stuff?
Check out Google's office space in Zurich,
read Peter Sagal's reaction to forgetting girls in Whoville,
and a new Top Five.

Somebody stop me!

I just can't stop blogging about American Idol. What is wrong with me? (Last night M said, "Blogs are so 2005." and I said, "Blogs are forever!" and M. said, "I'm going to write that on a t shirt and give it to you." Now I really want that t-shirt!) My sister rather astutely pointed out that when Randy doesn't like a song, he'll ask them a question like, "How you doing tonight, dawg?" instead of "Listen up, dawg..." She was dead right on that one, folks. Re: last night's American Idol, all I can say is "How you doing?" I thought pretty much every single song kind of sucked for this one reason: No one can sing a Dolly Parton song like Dolly Parton. Her voice is just so sweet and perfect and full of expression, I'm crazy about her.

Last night really exemplified that je ne sais pas of the difference between a good cover and mere karaoke, 'cause I thought all those songs just sounded like karaoke. IMHO, there are only two covers that come close to being good covers of her songs - the ridiculous and dated I Will Always Love You by Whitney, who nevertheless knocks it out of the park at the end, and a Jolene, by Mindy Smith from this dumb album called Just Because I'm a Woman, which is a bunch of people singing Dolly Parton's best songs not half as well as Dolly.

Viva la Dolly!

New Look

Spent a few hours today updating the "look" of Agoraphobia and Bookish. Have been wanting to do that for a while and turns out it wasn't difficult at all. I used these two guides to help. Let me know what you think!

And here's a little blast from the past to show you how much things have changed! That's my sister, me, Mac the cat, and my bro. How about those leg warmers, right?!? Check out the new Top Five, too!

Winter Luau

Even as snow still lay on the ground we had our Winter Luau. I thought it went off marvelously, despite the fact that M had a little cold and that we incurred the wrath of karma by jacking up the heat to 83 degrees during Earth Hour. (I felt really bad about that.) Ironically, our coat rack fell right out of the wall due to the weight of everyone's winter coats. Isn't that funny? We served Mai Tais and Miehanas and went crazy decorating with paper umbrellas and garnishes.We dragged the patio umbrella into the dining room to create a make-shift lanai.
Me and my galfriends in our finest faux-flowers...

Top THIS

There's this television show called Top This Party (or maybe Top That Party) where ridiculous people throw ridiculous parties with the help of semi-witless party planners. At the beginning of each show, the party planner asks the host how much they're willing to spend on the party, and they usually lean back, and with a great show of braggadocio, say, "I don't think we could do it for less than ten." They mean, of course, ten THOUSAND dollars, otherwise a rather large percentage of say, my total educational cost. And in each show, there's some ridiculous element, like a giant snake or an entrance by helicopter that almost doesn't happen because of the witlessness of the party planner, and the host goes totally ape shit and claims that the whole party will be ruined if it doesn't work out.

This is all background information.

Tonight we're having a Luau, and the ridiculous element is a stuffed pig on a spit, without which, I'm pretty sure, the whole party would be completely ruined. I enlisted my friend C, Master Thrift Store Shopper, to assist me in finding a stuffed pig. She asked me, "How much are you willing to spend?" I leaned back in my chair and said, "I'm willing to go as high as three." She knew what I meant.

Certain people (like a certain husband) said it couldn't (or was that "shouldn't"?) be done. But I think it looks pretty awesome. Top That!

Pop

Today I listened to a really great This American Life called Testosterone. TAL is simply a MUST-HAVE 'cast for your 'pod, yo. There's a bit where they interview a dude who used to be a woman and got massive doses of testosterone, and then everyone on the show had their levels tested and were shocked by the results. It's so interesting how people perceive the relationship between testosterone and manliness. Of course, I think gender is merely a construct, but I still found the show crazy interesting.

Watched the How I Met Your Mother with Britney. There seems to be a bit of buzz about how she didn't suck. I thought she was as good as any high school theatre actor. Apparently the national bar is very low, Britney! And why can't Alyson Hannigan just be Willow?

In American Idol News, I really dug Jason Castro's Fragile, and I really liked WhatshisName Cook's Billy Jean (I almost know their names now!) Ugh, how about Dingaling singing I'm Proud to Be An American... uh... what? Let that be a lesson to all of us - if you're a no-talent singer on a national show and about to be kicked off, just pull out a jingoistic song about freedom and ask them to put a humongous American flag behind you for the whole thing.

Seriously, does anyone know how they choose the songs and make the arrangements? Surely these kids don't do it all by themselves in a week, right? You know what drives me absolutely bats? How those girls in the front wave their arms back and forth. If two of them are on the same beat, may I be struck by lightening right now... (still here.) They look like a bunch of dang sea monkeys.

I JUST want to have fun

I went to see my beloved hairstylist, Brad, and finally got the blonde hair I've been wanting.

Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day

My sister and I saw Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day in LA. I love watching movies in California, everyone just seems to take them so much more seriously there. Also, I like clapping when the movie's over. At the theatre we went to, they had costumes from the show on mannequins in the lobby. Somehow that greatly increased my film-watching pleasure. It's a pre-war story, so the costumes are absolutely gorgeous constructed pieces - fabulous hats and amazing art nouveau sets.

Like an old fashioned comedy of manners, Miss Pettigrew Lives for Day is the story of penniless Miss Pettigrew (Francis McDormand), a disapproving, uptight, daughter-of-a-minister who, if she wants to eat, must work as the social secretary of an aspiring actress with more relaxed morals, Delysia Lafosse (the very charming Amy Adams). Miss Pettigrew finds herself shaking her own convictions to help Delysia juggle her boyfriends while Delysia works to make Miss Pettigrew more presentable, thus transforming her from the dowdy, unkempt matron to a well-coiffed companion.

All of that would have added up to a bit of fluff if the movie didn't take place on the dawn of WWII. The older, (British) characters look on with dread of anticipation while the younger ones are merely caught up in the excitement and naivety of impending war time. I'd recommend it to just about anyone, especially if you like a good costume.

Happy Easter

Look at this little rabbit!We're off to the baptism of nephew #2 this weekend. Peace!

Home Again

I've returned, tanned, after a relaxing and restorative vacation with my sister and nephew in California. I had a great time, but I'm happy to be home again with a certain husband and a certain cat.

Here's how hard Milo cried when he found out I was leaving:

Holidays

What a whirlwind of holidays - first it was Pi Day (3.1415927) on 3/14 (M. and his coworkers celebrated with a piece of pie at 1:59 last year), then the Ides of March, now St. Patrick's Day, which is something of a ridiculous holiday in Chicago. It's not unusual for people to take off the day after St. Patty's Day, anticipating a serious hangover. St. Patty's always sneaks up on me, but old school Chicagoans anticipate it like Christmas.

Yesterday we went to the Kara Walker Retrospective at the Hammer Museum - great show.

This morning Milo seemed really interested in my coffee, so I held it so he could investigate. He stuck his hand in and then licked his hand (it was lukewarm) - then he did it like 20 times while I giggled myself silly and C. watched in horror. I said, "Did you ever see anything like it?!?" and she said, "No, I never saw a grown person give a small child coffee."

We're all off the airport tomorrow - I'm back to the Icelandic Hinterland and C & M are going to Florida. I'd better go get in some more sunshine time before I leave.

Oh, there's a fun Top Five up, go check it out!

The days continue in a sunny, warm blur of a sweet young nephew and the (requisite) afternoon cocktail. C and I amuse ourselves with American Idol - was sad to see whathisname go last night, but mostly just because he looks like the type of guy I would have liked to make out with in college.

Oh, here's a funny story - my brother and my dad's birthdays were this past Monday (Happy Birthday!) - I told my dad on the phone that M and I had gotten him tickets to see the Cubs soon. So, he asks me, "Do you know who they're playing?" and I say, "Yeah, the Patriots."
He says, "How about the Padres?" and I say, "Maybe. I think it starts with a 'P'."
He says, "Well, honey, the Patriots are a football team."

Turns out it's the Pirates, Daddy-o! Hope that'll be fun.

And then I got pooped on

It took a little time for a certain nephew to warm up to me (and, just possibly, vice-versa). I have a dry wit that not all tiny people appreciate. Only mommy's hug, it seemed, was one that would cease, say, a peeling screech that melted the brain. Finally, this weekend, Auntie K was trusted enough by the youngster to be held not just when he was half asleep. Lo, did I find myself holding the baby for about an hour at 5AM so my poor sister could get a little sleep. It was both incredibly sweet and mildly disgusting to feel his little mittens touching my arm as he deposited a puddle of drool down my cleavage.

Speaking of disgusting, yesterday we were sitting together - he was wearing a diaper and a "one-sie" - and when I picked him up, he'd pooped on my pant-leg.

Update!

Well, the big news is that a certain nephew took his FIRST STEPS last night! My sister was darned excited and so was I when I realized what was going on. He took about three steps to C. out on the patio, then he did it again inside about half and hour later, then a bit later he took approximately five steps. We should try to catch it on film since the old man's out of town... But, if you want to picture it in your mind, it looks something like a miniature King Kong lurching toward his mother.

My visit to the poolside resulted in an early-March sunburn. Not to bad but I'm a little pink, my skin having been completely deprived of sun for lo, these many months. I think I'm going to head out and get a nice California burrito for lunch.

Reality

I enjoyed another morning on the patio that was heavenly hot. Ah, I think it's only 70ish, but compared to Chicago, it's tropical. Last night my sister had a book club meeting (I wrote about it on my book blog). I'm totally starting a book club when I get home!

C. and I watched the boys sing on American Idol. I like watching that show, but I wish the judges were better. Simon is the only one with any thing to really say, the other two never offer anything constructive. They should get some music people that really know what they're talking about. Like, on Project Runway, who could be more brilliant than MOB Michael Kors and Nina Garcia? (I can't wait to hear what Victoria Beckham has to say - don't tell me who won, we haven't watched the finale yet!!!!) And, Tyra's a complete lunatic, but at least she, Nigel, Miss J, and now Paulina Bitchzkova have expert and inspired things to say about (of all things) modeling.

Well, the poolside is calling my name - I'm off!

When the going gets tough...

Chicago seems to just be getting colder and colder. February finally took me out in the end, I got a bad cold and we even had to cancel our Winter Luau. There comes a time when a girl must face facts, pack her bags, kiss her beloved husband goodbye, and jump on a plane for warmer climes.

Lo, did I find myself sitting on a patio, in the sun, with my coffee. No flannel-lined pants, no sweater, no coat, no fur-lined hat, no socks, no boots, no gloves, no scarves.

My sister's place has changed a lot since the last time I was here P.B. (pre-baby). Their once clutter-free house now has a various pile of toys, actual items on the counter tops, and there's a child-shaped monkey permanently attached to her leg. That's not the only change. Murphy tried to romance me in the bed last night - C. shouted "That's not how we show affection in this house!" Ah, we're peas in a pod. When dogs at the shelter I used to volunteer at misbehaved, I would yell, "That is NOT APPROPRIATE!"

In other news, thrilled that HC rocked it in Texas and Ohio! Yeah!