what was that?

I just finished reading Goodbye, Columbus, by Philip Roth. It was excellent, and now I want to read everything he's ever written. It's like I've discovered the JD Salinger I've been searching for all my life.

This morning something gross happened. I saw a dead mouse fetus on the steps of the El. At least, I think it was a mouse fetus. It looked like a tiny, hairless, dead mouse. But later, I started thinking that actually it was probably too BIG to be a baby dead mouse, and maybe it was... something else. I hate to THINK what else it might have been. So, anyway, it was really gross and sad. You know, how did it GET there? Halfway up the steps to the El platform, I'm telling you.

In other news, I got a teaching job at a small college downtown! It's just one class, and not a big deal, but I'm excited about it. Now when people ask me what I do, instead of saying, "Uh, I sit at home, crying over Baby Story and eating whole things of Red Vines," I can say, "I teach at a college." BooYA!

Eek! I'm 32!

This weekend was my birthday, and I had a great time. Some friends joined us for a Redmoon Theatre production in Millenium Park, which, actually, wasn't as great as I was hoping it would be, but it was fun sitting in the sun. Later we came back to our house for cocktails and eventually went out to dinner. Also I got an interview, so with any luck, I might soon be minimally employed. I've also got my fingers crossed for another job that's opening up at the Art Institute. So, I'm trying to keep my hopes up that after longer than I care to admit, I will re-enter the working world.

Malan!

Well, I just can't believe my fave contestant on Project Runway, Malan, the Tim Curry look-alike, is OUT. Even if his dress did literally look like poo, Angela or Vincent really should have got the boot. Now how am I going to figure out how he got that fake Eurotrash accent? It was a real heartbreak for me; I was really rooting for him. Actually, I'm listening to Tim Gunn's podcast right now, and it seems clear that Vincent should have got the auf wiedersehen.

The clothes from the show are being auctioned off. Looks like you can snag a size 0 dress for about $300 - which is either a good or a terrible price, considering rumors that the clothes are stapled, glued and taped together.




I don't need the worst website of all time, My Heritage, to tell me these two look alike.

Ooooooo - I'm telling!

Well, Jesus Fucking Christ, our president said "shit" - can you believe it's made international news? (The BBC rather charmingly said he used an "ex-pleetive") What I found most crass about the whole situation is how he casually buttered a piece of bread and spoke to Tony Blair with his mouth full. It pretty ironic that Bush depends on this ultra-conservative crew he's created, and now they're all freaking out because he said a bad word. Maybe they'll get "fuck-you" Dick Cheney to wash his mouth out with soap.

This is hysterical

Amy Sedaris and Stephen Colbert tumble!

Other people are gorgeous

Other people are gorgeous, or, as I heard Michael Kors say on Project Runway last night: gorge. So, you know what I just did? I thought maybe the whole My Heritage debacle below was a fluck, and whatever picture you put in, you get a bunch of weird results - but I put in my friend's baby, and it says she looks like Eva Herzigova, Norah Jones, Zhang Ziyi, Uma Thurman, Johnny Depp and Marilyn Monroe. And she totally does!

Oh, you wanna see something freaky? Check out M/Peter Sellers!

Kicking a girl when she's down

I signed up for this thing called Daily Candy - they send you and email every day with cool stuff you should check out. Today they link to this site called My Heritage, where you upload a picture of yourself, and then they show you what celebrity you look like. The results are just cruel. Here I am, full of low self-esteem, unemployed, and this is what they give me...



Oh, come ON! That's rude.

Well, I suppose Alexander Dumas is a handsome man, but...

that's just ridiculous!

and here's the only woman, who looks to be about 85 years old. Fuck you, My Heritage... fuck you.

Lunch at Tiffany's

Yesterday I had a kind of crazy day - I went to the Mile and did a little bit of shopping and got totally SOAKED in the rain. I was sopped like a dog so I decided to duck into Tiffany's to have my ring polished. It got really scratched when I fell off my bike and broke my wrist. Did you know if you buy jewelry at Tiffany's, they'll clean it for you for free like, forever? M & I figure we might be able to get our money back in polishing. har har har. Anyway, I was a bit miserable from being wet and jostled on Michigan Avenue, but then I had a nice Audrey Hepburn moment and felt a lot better.

Last night we attempted to see Pirates of the Caribbean at the $5 movie theatre, but the place was a frickin' madhouse and there for 4 million people there, plus their kids. The next 2 shows were sold out, so we left. On the way out, I saw a grown man pick his daughter's nose, and then freak out supposedly because the booger was gross. Then he wiped it on the wall and made all this kids look at it. It was a really classy day.

LA Review

Well, I'm back from LA, where I had just a terrific time with my sister and Murphy. My brother-in-law's in Europe on tour with Steve Tyrell and by the looks of his blog, he's having a fabulous time. I got to catch up with some old friends, went to a couple of museums, but most importantly, spent some good quality time with my sis laying by the pool or on the couch watching movies. Here are some pics:



this is a dirty one I took of M and C eating chocolate bananas on Olvera Street, the oldest section of Los Angeles and a really nifty place to hang out, see some historical buildings and shop around in the market. Check out Mike's short hair! Oh, turns out Mike's not the only one to cut his dramatic locks - check out our friend Stan.


this is us at the Getty Villa in Malibu - a great place to spend the afternoon and have lunch, which is exactly what we did.



The Villa has really amazing architecture and details, like this stone floor. What better display for my adorable pedicure?



Here's another shot of the gardens there. The gardens are fabulous, and there's an herb garden that's olfactory heaven!



and this is Murphy, everyone's special friend and just the best dog you'll ever know.

Now that I'm back in Chicago it's back to the old job search. I also wrote a few movie reviews for my long-ignored other website. Check out my reviews for The Devil Wears Prada and The Da Vinci Code - two movies based on some of the worst books ever written!

Hockney-esque

We went to the LACMA the other day and saw the Hockney exhibit as well as five Klimts,including the one that sold for 135m! I'm a bit grouchy with Maria Altmann for selling Adele I the minute she laid her hands on her, but... what are you going to do? The Hockney portraits were really cool, and we practiced taking some Hockney shots ourselves.

news

I'm in LA visiting my sista and my brother-in-law. The bad news is I have a really bad cold, but I guess the good news is they have HBO On Demand, and my sister, like me, has the capacity to watch hour after hour of television. Hello, Big Love. Other good news is that I had a good interview last week, but the bad news is I didn't get the job. Well, I feel my nyquil kicking in so I'm going to lie down...

skater boiz

So, from my rather nifty perch at the Art Institute (right behind the lion), where I volunteer, I see hundreds of young men whatdoyoucallit? skating, roller.. no, skateboarding down the Michigan Avenue at various levels of competency. Mostly what looked like poor to terrible levels (I saw a lot of crashes) - but what fun they were having! Crazy sight. And like, I could smell them. And it was hot today. I could smell them with a plate glass window and 30 feet between us. I detest the smell of "boy".

Last night our very special one, our little Kaya (oh, how I love her!) SCRATCHED for the FIRST TIME her special scratching post. Mike and I went totally bat shit and started praising her and picking her up and kissing her and poured out her whole can of treats for her to eat. We scared her so much she'll probably never scratch it again. You know what sucks about cats? You can hardly buy them anything. Buying cute outfits, I figure, is like, the reason most people have kids. It's one of the reasons I intend to one day get a ridiculous little dog so I can buy it ridiculous little outfits.

Investigate this!

What's this I hear about Karl Rove sliding off the hook? I wonder whose grandma spent a week in the trunk of a car before that happened? I suppose Republicans think this is another big "win", just like killing Zarqawi (which, BTW, the Daily Show has been doing some good bits on lately.)

In other news, there's been a dramatic change in MY most trusted advisor - here are some before shots of him. Mike donated his hair to an awesome program called Locks of Love. Very soon, some little girl will be wearing Mike's hair - that makes me feel all fuzzy inside.

Andersonville Rocks

One of the advantages of my neighborhood is the annual Midsommar Fest, which I really think is the best fest in all of Chicago. I mean, you're likely to get shot at Taste of Chicago, but at Midsommar, the worst you'll encounter is a poor reel in lederhosen. It's really the lederhosen that separates Midsommar from all the other fests. That and the tres cool, dog-owning, baby carriage pushing, lesbian vibe. I love Andersonville, and really can't imagine living anywhere else in Chicago, but please oh please, can't you stay out? It's getting hard to park on the weekends. Find your own cool neighborhood, loser. hee! Well, if you are visiting, I've placed some books outside for a giveaway and registered them through bookcrossing.com, which is a really cool website and program, you should check it out. Its occurring to me that someone might interpret my personality based on the books I'm getting rid of. There's CS Lewis's Mere Christianity, the Pope's book, some book by Mitchner called the Covenant that neither one of us will claim and have no intention of reading and a bunch of books by Carl Hiaasen. The casual passerby might assume I hate Florida and have given up on organized religion. Actually, I guess that's mostly true, but mostly I'm trying to declutter. (bands pictured are Bumpus and Funkadesi - they were great!)

Devil's Lake

Last weekend we went camping at Devil's Lake - it was really fun, and by far the best park I've been to for camping and hiking in the midwest. This picture of Mike's feet was taken while the rest of us stood far back, shouting at him to come back from the edge. When I downloaded this picture, I got mad, but I have to admit it's a great shot, and, it turns out he didn't fall to his death after all, so it worked out ok.

Love Song

I saw Love Song at the Steppenwolf this week - it was mostly boring, although it had an amazing set. Lately the shows I've seen at the Steppenwolf have better sets than they do plays. The last stinko I saw was The Well-Appointed Room which had the most amazing set I've ever seen. It had an actual Herman Miller Eames lounger. Do you have any idea how much those cost? Oh, I should very much like to have one of those chairs one day. Anywho - I don't think I'm going to renew my subscription to the Steppenwolf next season, not only because I won't be able to score my sweet student discount, but because the lineup looks terrible. Anne Frank's Diary? Give me a break!

they can take those bricks and shove them up...

OMG, according the NY Times, people are sending bricks to their senators as a not-so-subtle message about the border between the US and Mexico. I have to wonder, did these people mourn when the Berlin Wall came down? Should we build other walls between the "good" parts of town and the "bad" ones? Has anyone actually contacted any Nazi's for advice on how to build a good strong wall and what measures to take when people cross it? Like, how big should the no-man's-land be, and whether you should leave the dead bodies lying around as messages to others interested in crossing - oh, I know, why don't these jackasses just mail the dead bodies of Mexicans to their senators, that might make a statement. Or, better yet, why not put the slain bodies IN the wall, like they did when they were building the Wall of China in, what was that? Oh yeah, the 3rd century. Pics: Building of Berlin wall, 1961; construction of "Security Fence" between Isreal and Palestine, 2000.

I'm an art historian!

Promised pictures from my graduation weekend. The ceremony at Millenium Park was really nice - Elizabeth Catlett spoke - she's an artist I really admiire. The weather was gorgeous and there were some good speeches. Had a great party with friends and family in our backyard - after a week of rain, we had a gorgeous day of reprieve. Was really grateful to have everyone around - I have some of the best friends in the whole world and felt, as I frequently do around this gang and my sweet sweet husband, a sort of overwhelming sense of happiness that I have been blessed by these people.

Free at last!

I had my cast taken off today! I'm typing (painfully) with two hands!!! Although I did have the most beautiful cast off all time (confirmed by the Dr.) I did gleefully leave it behind, but here are some pics to remember it fondly. Thanks to those of you who made it a bit more tolerable by decorating it so nicely! My arm's not as weird looking as I thought it would be, or as smelly, after scrubbing it for a good half hour - oh, delicious water - but a bit swollen and odd looking. Tomorrow: pictures from my graduation?

now what?

Yeeow! Friday I had my last class, so that's mostly that for my master's degree. This week I am going to present my thesis at a symposium, and then Sat. is graduation. After that all I have to do is find a job and starting paying off massive amounts of student loans, innit? If you run into me, I beg you, please don't ask me what I'm going to do now, cause I don't know, and the mere question gives me heart palpitations.

I saw my friend Caitlin's solo show at The NeoFuturarium, and it was an amazing, strong performance. I was so impressed by the honesty and humor she brought to the subject of reality tv makeover shows, with their mind-numbing qualities and simultaneous effect of making viewers feel superior. It's a topic close to my heart. Her performance is nicely paired with another show about this guy who was on Jeopardy. Check it out!

In other news, an old classmate of mine is on the E Channel's "Daily 10." She used to be Cathy, but now she's "Catt." I have a feeling that's going to torment me in my upcoming period of unemployment.