live long

Oy, what a weekend. On friday night we had book club - it was really fun - review to come soon on my book blog, which, according to Google Analytics is 2xs more popular than this blog! So, you guys are totally missing out. ha.

Yesterday we saw the new Star Trek movie - I thought it was quite good although I kinda wish it had been a little more naughty. Like, Kirk and Spock and whatstheirnames are all kids, I would have enjoying seeing them act more like dumbasses. But, all in all, I thought it was a fun movie. Next I want to see UP - in 3D!

Today went to a friend's b-day party - had turducken brats - awesome.

Erg, weekend went by so fast.

Memorial Day Weekend

We had an absolutely fabulous weekend at my friend's family lake house in N. Indiana. There were nine friends, one big house, great food, lots of drinks, and I think it was about 10 degrees warmer than Chicago. I didn't wear shoes all weekend and my bathing suit was my main item of clothing. That's the life.

On Sat. we tried out the Miracle Berries that M & I brought along. Have you heard about these? You eat them, and then sour foods taste crazy sweet. I ordered the tablets because the berries are ridic expensive - it was really fun - you should try it. Our buffet included (l-r): Limes, radishes, grapefruit, onion, popcorn, diakon, carrot, pineapple, rhubarb and lemon. My faves were the lemon and the rhubarb - it was like a slice of pie. Oh, we also had apple cider vinegar, balsamic vinegar, Guinness and tabasco. It was awesome and hilarious! One caveat: fruit tastes good; beer tastes bad.
Otherwise we laid around on the dock, slipping into the water when we got too hot and lounging about on various screened-in porches, played a bunch of Rock Band, Celebrity, and mixed drinks.
Here's me and M enjoying a beautiful sunset.

priceless

Last weekend in Indiana there was lots of talk about who/when/where re: morel hunting. My aunt's husband (somehow not quite my uncle) said it was a "bad year" for morels, and he only found "five or six."

"Oh, that is pretty bad," I said.

"Pounds." Oh, come on.

Much was made of the sort of people who will shell out ridiculous amounts of money for morels. Well, my friends, M&I are exactly those kinds of people and today happily purchased 1/4 pound of mushrooms for $12. Yes, that's $48/lb, and worth every penny.

Hoosiers know there's one way to cook up your morels, and that's fried in butter:
Hello, my precious
flour and pepper bath

mmm...

Lunch!

Mamas don't let your babies

Had a great weekend in Indiana visiting our mothers and grandmothers. M & I made a nice brunch for everyone and I think it went pretty well. I only wish we had had more time and that my sister had been there too!

me da and his mother
M & his granny
me and my gran and mom. Eek! My hair makes me look like a crazy person...

I love lists

I happen to love making lists. Today, I was thinking to myself: I'm going to make a list of types of lists. While putting it together in my head, I happened to hear about another list, which is possibly better than my list: the Overrated list, apparently initiated by that rat bastard Christopher Hitchens. Hitchens supposedly said “the four most overrated things in life were champagne, lobsters, anal sex, and picnics.” I disagree with two out of those four things.

The list is not as easy to formulate as one might think. Do I include our ostentatious 42 inch, high def, flat screen television? No, it's obnoxious, but it's also friggin' awesome. Paris? No, I totally love Paris. Luxury cars? How would I know?

Special K's list of 4 Overrated Things
1. Orson Welles
2. Master's degrees
3. little children
4. Live music

What's yours?

Playing with fire

Dudes, that BofA stock I bought is like the smartest buy I ever made. I'm soooooo excited. I'm so excited I want to SELL SELL SELL! But, instead I have to wait like 20 years and then see if I can retire "early". I doubled down on it and guess what it's at today? 12.69! I bought that shit at $7, baby!

I know it's gauche to gloat about one's progress in the market and recreate conversations with one's mother online - this will surely end in tears with all of us living in caves with a rotten-leaf-based economy. But for now I've got that glorious feeling of excitement - that wonderful, early-nineties feel that I had before I uh, M & I lost our jobs and everything went horribly, horribly wrong...

such pretty eyes

Me: I saw Wolverine this weekend.
Mom: Oh, I don't know why you would go to that. The trailers are so loud.
Me: It was ok.
Mom: What is it, he's supposed to be a good guy, but it's like he has scissor hands?
Me: ha!
Mom: What's he like? 'I'm a good guy?' Scrape! Scrape?
Me: ha! ha!
Mom: He has those pretty eyes and then, what is it? He has scissor hands? And they cut through anything? A person? An airplane?
Me: ha!
Mom: And it's scrape! Scrape?
Me: Mom, that's hilarious, because, you know why? In the comic book, his hands make a noise like "Snikt! Snikt!"
Mom: Oh, snick? snick!
Me: ha! ha!
Mom: Well, Bud's been killing all sorts of animals and dragging them up on the porch. He left the head and tail of a chipmunk and I kept throwing it out in the woods and he kept bring it back.
Me: Gross! What was it like?
Mom: Oh, it wasn't that bad, he'd eaten almost everything. It was like... snick!

h1a1

I made the mistake of listening to some pundits last week and getting so upset about swine flu I had to go to bed early and go to my mental happy place. It didn't help that my place of business sent out an email that they had "been preparing for a pandemic for a long time" and then proceeded to inform us of the ways we were to be kept safe, which involved us covering our mouths when sneezing and frequently washing our hands.

I am of the opinion that informing grown people of things they should do out of common decency is completely useless if that person does not already do those things. For example, most restaurants have a sign in the bathroom that implores employees to "Wash hands before returning to work." Those people, and people who do not cover their mouths when they sneeze or cough, are not going to suddenly start acting like responsible citizens of the world because you ask them nicely. They are animals, and will kill us all one day with their filthy germs.

My "cousin" KHM has just about the only reasonable view of this whole thing I've heard. Check out her recent posts.

Snikt - no spoilers. No big ones.

Last night we saw Wolverine with a bunch of friends - it was so fun. The movie had gotten some really bad reviews, so our expectations were low, and, we were uh, pretty drunk.

Wolverine is the origin story, so we start with a wee-wolverine cub and his brother. As soon as they can grow facial hair, they start seeing the same barber and will continue to do so for, apparently, the rest of their lives. The two are something of professional soldiers until Wolverine gets kind of grossed out by his brother's obvious bloodlust. Then he moves to Canada, that great symbol of I'm-sick-of-war.
Some stuff happens, and Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights shows up. He's ok, but unfortunately he doesn't make out with anyone. I totally saw Hugh Jackman's penis. I swear to you, every woman in the theatre giggled for like 5 straight minutes after seeing Jackman naked.

Many ridiculous things happen - this is entertainment, not art - more than one person falls to their knees and reaches their arms out and screams into the heavens as the camera pulls back. The silliest moment is small but the most intellectually insulting: Wolverine slashes through a metal wall in the shape of an "X" and the bits in the middle stay in place. Who do they take us for? Leave your brain at the door, don't forget your flask! Have fun!

Gluton

Something I find very interesting lately is how everyone, including myself, seems to have forgotten how terrible X3 was. I mean, it was really, REALLY terrible. And yet, something comes over me when I see these Wolverine commercials, and I will, yes I will, be in line for opening night, possibly wearing false gigantic sideburns and shouting Snikt, Snikt!

How can they make two terrific X Men (I really prefer "X Person") movies, one so incredibly bad, and I'm still ready for more?

So far the summer-movie agenda isn't looking too promising... there's that weird Tarantino thing I'm not going anywhere near; Up, which looks stupid but it's Pixar so I have hope; and - nuthin'. Don't get me started on Angels and Demons.

Lovely things?

I got my hair done - it's much lighter than it looks in this picture, but, just in case you miss looking at my mug...I shamelessly photoshopped out a pimple from my chin.

Do you miss What's In My Garden? I do. For better or for worse, we can identify just about everything that grows up in our yard. Aren't these gorgeous?
It's been raining cats and dogs all weekend but I don't really care 'cause it gives me a chance to wear my rainboots.

By popular demand

Ha ha! So, last week I bought some BAC stock, and now, wait for it...25% gain in a week! BOOM! Uh oh... Husband says I shouldn't blog about what stocks we buy because it's inappropriate and private. Is that true?

Perhaps I should also buy stock in World's Best Cat Litter, which actually may be the world's best cat litter. I thought I had found cat litter nirvana (if such a thing is possible) back when my friends introduced me to Feline Pine (can you imagine that scene?). Feline Pine really rocked my world because, as everyone knows, clay cat litter is v. bad for person and puss alike. That "crystal" litter is effing disgusting. Do not, under any circumstances, buy it. Feline Pine's made of pine and scoops. It smells quite nice, only, if you're a lazy bastard like I am, and you don't change the litter box as often as you should, it gets kind of gross. This World's Best stuff is made of corn, somehow. I think Kaya likes it. The nice thing about World's Best Litter is that, if you are a lazy bastard like I am, and don't clean the box as often as you should, it doesn't really get that gross. AND! You can flush it in the toilet, so, if you're really lazy, like I am, you don't even have to drag in a bag and throw it out. Fancy, right?

integrity

Had a very interesting day at work because this rep from Google visited us and we were all absolutely ga-ga over him. I think Google is just the greatest company, and I love their products. Something I think is so interesting is that our culture expects companies (read: owners of) to dick the public and their own employees for the sake of quick profits. I'm not just talking about Enron or AIG - I think, generally, most people would be very, very foolish to put much faith in their employer. In such a culture, Google is a rare example of a company with heart. It's such a do-no-harm company that's it's almost a joke, right? Even though it's hard for me to believe, because I'm a distrusting bitter misanthropist who was laid-off in the early aughts and the daughter of a auto union member, I do think they're the real deal. Did you know you can take your dog to work if you work at Google? Anyway, it was nice to reflect on a cool business model, and to feel relatively confident in my own employer.

M & I are trying to pay more attention to the markets - we're both choosing some stocks to buy. I totally want some Google but it's quite expensive. I bought some Bank of America, which, like most banks, is at BARGAIN BASEMENT prices. Ho-ho! So far, it's up 13% since I bought it!

boring?

Lately I've been a bit unsure of what to blog about (do you detest the use of "blog" as a verb? I kinda do) because, well, I think it might be boring, and I aim to thrill and amuse, like when I hold a fingerstache up to my friend's cat, or write about two squirrels having sex in a tree, and other things that don't even involving animals being ridiculed. But, I frequently think of these two great bloggers I used to love reading, both of whom became pretty lame after they got pg and started writing about pregnancy jeans all the time. So, when I get excited about, say, this new cat litter that I love, I'm all I'mtotallygonnablogaboutthatcatlitter and then I'm like, nowait,thatstheequivilantofpregnancypants.

Anywho, among the boring things I have avoided blogging about are the various plants that are shooting up in the garden, the aforementioned cat litter, unparalleled joy at riding my bike again, missing my out-of-town friends, trying to figure out what stocks to buy, and my changing feelings about Facebook. Although, the more I think about it, those are merely the mundane things that make me me, and perhaps you would like to read them. Stay tuned for my next post on some cat litter that's really going to change your life.

Happy Easter!

Here's an old shot I stole from KM's Facebook. Me, K, and C - cute, huh? How about those socks?

Adventureland

Saw Adventureland last night and really enjoyed it. It's about a kid who graduates from college and finds out his parents lost some money and he can't go to Europe for the summer and ease into grad school like he'd planned. Instead, he gets a job at the local amusement park.

The trailers play it up as a Judd-Apatowish comedy, but it's actually much more than that - more like Juno or Little Miss Sunshine than, say, Superbad.

Nostalgic without being corny, Adventureland takes place in the kind of non-corporate theme park that doesn't exist any more, the 1987 of stone-washed, high waist jeans. There's a great soundtrack heavy on the Velvet Underground, and a solid cast rounded out by Kristen Wigg and Bill Hader from SNL who play the ridiculous park managers, but play them straight.

It just goes to show you that there's nothing much funnier than earnestness - which is how Jesse Eisenberg plays James. I thought he and Kristen Stewart were evenly matched, her wiser, more skeptical character was a good contrast to his trusting, virginal one.

The movie also had some gorgeous shots of the amusement park and the rides. I thought it had some simply lovely moments that really captured the romantic idea of young love at the fair at twili... at that certain time of day.

American Idol

I caught up with American Idol - but, for realz, I'm totally going to quit that show soon. I liked Tattoo-Arm the best - she had a nifty voice. I suppose I like Red-Haired-One the best now although she's kind of boring. I can't stand The Hideous One and his ridiculous hair and his dopey songs - Play that Funky Music? Really?

But what drives me nuts is how everyone's been going crazy over The Blind Dude - BFD, so he's blind - what's to overcome? Everybody's always like, "Wow, he's such an inspiration! A beautiful voice, and he's blind too!" It's not like being blind would any way inhibit a person from being a great singer. If the guy were deaf, then I'm interested, but blind? No.

Hawh-Hawh-Hawhn!

This weekend we went to my friend C's birthday party - it was a total blast (Happy Birthday, C!) M & I found their camera and took some shots for C&D to find later - these make me laugh, and I bet you will too:

Like a unicorn

Today I saw something that took me way back to October 8, 2003. What do 10/8/03 and 3/30/09 have in common, you ask? Why, on both days I saw a "Darwin Lizard" being eaten by a "Truth Fish", a rare sight, like a unicorn or the San Francisco Twins, which causes a warmth to fill my whole body to overflowing. In 2003 I was inspired to draw this other example, but today I thought, wouldn't it be marvelous if the "Truth Fish" were being eaten by a "Fact Fish"?

Yes, it's true, I enjoying mocking other people's religious beliefs, but, seriously, you've got to find a way to rectify Darwin better than just having him be eaten by "truth", right?

Some of you have discovered the joys of watching "Charlie Bit Me" over and over again, and I suspect some have not. Give it a try, why don't you? So far, it has not gotten old.

Earth (half) Hour

Last night we sort of celebrated Earth Hour. We tried to time it so that dinner would be ready at 8:30 and we could sit down to a relaxing candle-lit affair at the appropriate time, all lights darkened. Due to some unfortunate timing, M was knee-deep in a litterbox cleaning adventure that I must admit I strong-armed him into, and dinner was not quite finished. While M refused to finish the litterbox by candlelight, I nevertheless finished dinner in the dark, which is... not a good idea. When he finished, I implored him to wash his hands in the dark and join me, but he insisted at least a full-upper body wash and change of clothes was required. "But the LIGHTS!" I implored.

"Fuck Earth Hour!" sayeth he, dramatically flipping on the stairwell lights and trouncing upstairs.

Uh-oh. I think the Earth heard him, as we have been punished today with MORE SNOW and this interesting tid-bit of news: waves from 8-12 feet are gusting in Lake Michigan (whhaaaaaat?)

In other news, you won't believe it but I've been plagued with a weird stomach-thing lately. On the advice of some random person I met in Texas I've been taking activated-charcoal and chugging pepto-bismo* like a collage freshman on a bender. Aside from that I've been amusing myself by watching this video and saying "Charlie bit me and it really hurt."

* I know that's not how it's spelled, but that's how I like to pronounce it.