It is Spring! (What's in my garden?)

Finally, evidence of spring in the garden. Observe these lovely crocuses (croci?):


and my budding hyacinth:


Ünd the Siberian Squill:


Does anyone know what this is? I can't remember what I planted here...

Coconut

When we were in Hawaii a few years ago, driving along a mountain road we saw a woman selling roasted coconut. We do not like coconut, but we do like side-of-the-road-food, so we bought some, and it was incredible. We've never had anything like it since.

Husband is trying to recreate delicious treat and bought two coconuts and drained them (hammer a hole with an awl into opposite sides, like so...)


"There are two schools of thought," he tells me, "One is, you wrap it in a towel and you go outside and bang it like hell on the sidewalk. The other is, you wrap it in in a towel and go outside and hit it with a hammer." Observe.



That was disgusting. Then he did it again. Success.



Then you chop up the coconut and roast with sugar for... 10 hrs! It's still in the oven.

I'm just sayin'

So, check it out, I made this in like, 2005 (maybe 'aught four).


(It says, "Look, nothing was going to keep Bethany from surfing, ok?")

And NOW...



Oh! My! God! Look what happens about 1 minute and 10 seconds in!

It's YOUR MOVE, Helen Hunt!

40 days of rain

One of the fun things we did in LA was visit the Skirball Center where they have a Noah's Ark exhibit. They built a really beautiful interactive ark that you can wander through and play with a bunch of animals and climb on stuff and break stuff and scoop up fake poop and stuff. A lot of the animals are made from recycled materials, like, check it out, this sheep is made of a bike seat and handles, a mop and funnels. It's a really fun place, but probably best to go if you have a kid in tow, otherwise you might look pervy.

We also wandered around the Venice canals one day - that was really fun and I highly recommend it. You can peek in people's tiny yards and admire the architecture of this really unique area. And, if you're me, go home and try to figure out how much it would cost to live there (don't ask.).


Here's me and C on a sunny (but cold!) day!

Sucker Punch

When we were in LA, little M kept pointing at billboards and asking what Sucker Punch was all about. We told him it was about a "surprise punch" that was "for aunties and uncles only." I was quite interested in seeing this movie despite its horrendous reviews, because I like the actress in it. She's that young woman who was in Lemony Snicket? I love that movie. There's also a few other actresses that you may remember from child-roles, trying to prove they're All Grown Up now, a la Lindsay Lohan in (the hilarious) I Know Who Killed Me.

Anywho. Sucker Punch is by that director who made 300, so it's really stylized like that and frankly would probably have made a better video game. But, it's ostensibly about grrrls kicking ass, and it's kind of goth and steam-punk, with a Blythe-doll aesthetic, so that's kind of cool. The story is a dumb "dream within a dream" Inception-y kind-of-thing where this girl is put in a Dickensian mental institution, and to escape that reality, she imagines she's in a Dickensian bordello, and to escape that reality, she imagines she's fighting lunatic things like zombie nazis and orcs and the robots from iRobot. In all of these realities, the girls have some ridick faux eyelashes and buckets of Urban Decay make-up. For once I'd like to see a movie in the Girls Kicking Ass genre that wasn't executed as if by a 12 year old boy. I can guarantee you there'd be less fetishistic outfits (but maybe keep the faux eyelashes, amirite, ladies? Whatwhat?!)

Vacay

Last week we had a little vacation to LA for some warm weather and a nice visit with sister and beloved nephew. We didn't end up getting any nice weather, but but we did have a lovely visit with C and Little M. You wouldn't believe how many things went wrong, but nicer moments included dinners with old friends, a visit to Venice beach and wandering around the canals, seeing James Franco's installation at the Gagosian Gallery and getting mildly obsessed with River Phoenix. Also I got some super-cute Tarina Tarantino earrings. Here's a little video. 4 mins.

Things that have gone wrong on our vacation so far...

1. I destroyed my new G2 fone when water leaked all over it in my bag.
2. We left the lights on in my sister's car and had to call The Guy to jump it.
3. M & I were sitting in a bench and the back broke and we fell on the ground.
4. And everyone looked at us and it was embarrassing.
5. We went to war with Libya.
6. LA is having crazy downpours and there's flooding. No sun.

But, aside from that, we've been having a lovely time visiting with sister and beloved nephew. Pictures later.

W00T PWN: Assassin's Creed Brotherhood

Husband has been playing Assassin's Creed Brotherhood (PS3) for a loooong time now with no apparently intention to stop any time soon. In fact, when I said I was ready to write my review, he said, "I haven't even started the multi-player yet!" Pity.

As far as I can tell, in Assassin's Creed you plays this dude in a cape and hood who sneaks around and climbs up the side of buildings, like Spiderman or Jason Bourne. He goes on dopey "missions" in Rome in the 15th century (I looked it up on Wikipedia). The graphics are pretty nifty and I like looking at the city and the buildings. Thank GOD or I would have gone completely bonkers! M is somewhat obliging when I'm like, "Wait, go back and look at that fountain" or whatever. Also some of the characters mutter or shout in Italian like, "Andiamo" or "Scuzi" or "basta" and that's pretty cool. There's actually a TON of Italian in it. Also a lot of the locations are actual places. I wonder how much of the map of Rome is truly accurate? The dopey bits are that there's some kind of weird back and forth in time and like, the main character is actually like this contemporary dude in a laboratory or something? I don't really get it. And the missions are like, Go over there and knife that guy or Help that hooker find out who roofied her. And then later they're like, Drive Leonardo da Vinci's tank around.

You can buy a run-down doctor's shop and fix it up and then when you get stabbed you can go get "health". Or you can buy a tailor shop and have them make you a new cape and hood. You can also buy other stuff like art in a little shop on a side street and choose from any number of Raphael paintings like The Resurrection of the Christ or St. Michael and the Dragon. Ha. Well. I mean. Come on. That's very unlikely.
Also one day he bought the effing COLOSSEUM.

A video game just wouldn't be a video game without a gang of prostitutes. (M corrects me that they are "courtesans") They are actually the assassin's sister and mother! (M corrects me that they aren't actually courtesans, they just run the brothel.) All the courtesans have funny hairdos that make them look like they have kitten ears.

I think it would be a lot more fun if there were no killing and instead you just walked around Rome looking at stuff and visiting your friends' houses and talking in Italian. And maybe if the character had a wife and they went out for coffee and gelato and went to nice concerts at night and stuff.

I would rate this game pretty darn unbearable, at this point. It's never ending. Basta!

Oscar recap... well, not really

So, did you watch the Oscars? I live-tweeted them, although I think only approximately 2 (possibly less) people read them. I thought the Oscars were terribly dull, and I was a bit disappointed with the couture as well. Which reminds me - I took this Oscar Dress Quiz and was at once both incredibly proud and embarrassed by my excellent results. Why don't you take it?

Why I hate Glee (but keep watching it anyway)

I've been annoyed with Glee ever since the end of season 1 when Quinn got pregnanter and pregnanter and Will's wife was pretend pregnant and the writers were clearly like, Ooooooo crap, what are we gonna do now? Then, in one shitty season finale, Quin has the baby, Will gets a divorce and everyone brushes the dust off their hands and pretends the whole thing never happened. That's lazy. That's Alias season three lazy. You've gotta think four seasons ahead, Whedon-style.

1. What is this show, a Teenage Morality Tale or an Over-the-Top Ironic Comedy? Pick one, Gleeks. In one episode you've got the elements of a "very special drama" (this week: Underage drinking) coupled with Crazy Sue Sylvester Antics. I mean really crazy - she pushes a guy down the stairs? Really? And Will gets drunk and dials her and she plays the vm over the school speakers? It just doesn't make sense, they should choose, and they should choose the Over-the-Top thing. But it's just ridiculous, for example, to do a show about bullying with Sue as the unexpected protector and a couple shows later having the same character knocking down students and shoving them into lockers in the hallway and trying to launch the cheerleaders out of a cannon.

2. They're only about half-way to being pro-gay. I applaud Glee including non-normative characters like Artie in his wheelchair, the overweight Mercedes and Lauren, and a racially diverse cast, and I love Kurt, he's probably my favorite character. For the most part, I think the Kurt-story line is great, especially with his dad, but I think they really foul up other non-normative relationships like Santana and Britney and Puck and Lauren and particularly the character of Coach Beist. I wish they would spread the love when it comes to being open-minded.

3. Shut up and sing. I guess I'm going to keep watching because I like the musical numbers a lot.

After writing all this down, I find I care less and less about Glee. I think I'm going to take it off my queue. Probably next week. We'll see.

OMG, has anyone seen that show Perfect Couples? SO. HILARIOUS. I'mnotkiddingyou.

Milwaukee

We went for a last-minute trip to Milwaukee this weekend just for funsies. I have to tell you, one of the lamest things about living in/near Chicago is that the coolest place for miles and miles around is, well, Chicago. So, if you want to go away for the weekend, you go to Wisconsin. And you like it.

Anyway, Milwaukee is kind of fun, if you like eating cheese and drinking, which I do. We like staying at the Pfister Hotel, a lovely old place with a really nice little pool on the top floor. Great views of the city, in this case, under blizzardy-conditions.

We also discovered this fantastic bookstore called Downtown Books. It's one of those bookstores were every inch is covered in books, and it has all kinds of nooks and crannies and you get lost wandering around. Very fun bookstore - almost like a Powell's (Portland) experience. Also, there were cats. I bought like 7 books and M filled in some of the holes in his comic book collection.

Today before we returned home, we went to this AMAZING deli called Benji's. I found it on this website called Road Food by Jan and Michael Stern who (used to) write for Gourmet and guest talk on the Splendid Table radio show. They LOVE Milwaukee.
I ordered chicken soup. Just! Look! At! That!

and potato pancakes. Mmmm...

The Big Meal

Last night I saw The Big Meal at the American Theatre Co. with my play-buddies. It was absolutely amazing and I encourage anyone in the Chicago area to check it out.

A simple stage with a table or two and a number of chairs compose the stage, and actors sit in plain view behind this area waiting to come on, with small baskets of props by their sides. Time moves quickly in this play, and one of the things I loved about it is that the audience must be actively involved in watching it. The play tells the story of a couple and their extended family, told with only 8 main characters (and two waiters) at various stages in their lives. There are two kids, two people in their 20s, two in their late-30s, and two older folks. As the characters age, the actors switch roles, so each person may end up playing 3-4 roles in this multi-generational family. As people die, as they do, the audience and the actors have only moments to process their deaths, in a rather interesting bit of staging. Despite the complex characterization and quickly-moving storyline, the actors are so talented that each transition is seamless and smooth (I thought this was just incredible especially considering we were there for only the second preview!)

I have a feeling most people will walk away with their own impression of what the play's "about", but for me it was definitely an exploration of the definition of family - of what impact having children has, and how, even in a large family, the odds that you end up alone are pretty darn high. While it ended on kind of a down-note, I thought it was, above all: true - and that's what exceptional theatre is all about.

The Big Meal
American Theater Co.
1909 West Byron Street, Chicago
February 3-March 6

We're not going anywhere

If you don't have anything nice to say....

I just have to share this house tour from Apartment Therapy. I looove this house. Lately I've been kind of stuck on Apartment Therapy even though the people that comment on it are total asshats. They're such douchebags I almost took it off my feed. Even on this truly magnificent house tour, people are all "I do not like it. It's very cluttered and busy with too many patterns and objects." and "Way too much. It verges on Horder status. I couldn't live like this. The dusting alone would take up all of my time." OMG. Srsly? STFU.

Turns out the dude from Crash Test Dummies lives there. I used to/still looooove that band. Anyone else?

view house tour

tick tock

Oh, my, the weekend goes by so fast it gives me agita just thinking about it. I had/am having a simi-stressful weekend with some fun stuff thrown in. Yesterday we saw a cool print show at the Block Museum - they were having printing demonstrations and a sale, with a DJ and everything - it was more crowded than I've ever seen that place, so they might have been happy, even if everyone was vaguely miserable because of the long lines. M & I both liked this artist named Tom Huck. This piece is a woodblock print called Chili Dogs, Chicks and Monster Trucks. viaHis work really reminds me of Lisa Hanawalt, who also has a horror vacui. How they manage to cram all those things together and still maintain a clear narrative is really amazing. I really want to buy one of her pieces... I recently spied one of her illustrations accompanying a New York Times article! Can I get in before her market explodes?

We both got smart phones and I installed this cool "Retro Camera" app that makes all my pics turn out gorge. Look at this... Could you just die?

Tonight we have special plans to go out for what I hope will be a lovely dinner, and then, tomorrow, back to the old grind.

Oh, my review was posted in Newcity Lit - check it out!

Check, PLEASE!

I finally got around to watching Doubt today - I thought it was fabulous. Oh, Meryl Streep! Anyway, I was confused because I had heard there was like a total did-he-or-didn't-he thing, but for me it was totes HE DID! Did anyone else have a different impression?

Oh, great. My fave restaurant in town was on Check, Please! It's already hard enough to get a table at that place. The good news is they didn't give it a very favorable review.

Speaking of restaurants, me & husband went on a "date" (lately I've noticed that my friends with kids now call their evenings out "dates" where sans kids these events were just, you know, evenings out. Anywho, I merely mention it because I find it amusing) to one of (his) favorite Italian restaurants in The City, and, much to our horror, we discovered that unanticipated opera singing was occurring in the dining room. Experiencing a fair amount of chagrin, we are escorted to a table, but then offered a better table which was right next to wear this dude was belting out some opera. So, I whisper to the waiter, we'll take that one if the singing will be over soon. And he says, Yes, yes, he'll be finished in just a moment. So, the dude finishes, we all clap, and then M & I go slip in behind the table. No sooner do we sit down than another opera singer (and then another, and another) take his place and belt out some Puccini. I mean like, 12 inches away from us. Here. I'll draw a picture for you. It was pretty much like this.

Marwencol

Last night M & I saw this terrific documentary called Marwencol about this man who was attacked in a vicious fight and suffered brain damage and memory loss. As part of his own rehabilitation, he creates scenes with dolls and photographs them. He created a 1/16th scale town he called "Marwencol" and peopled it with the alter egos of himself and people he knows.
Eventually it's revealed that he was the victim of a hate crime, and it becomes clear that he suffers from massive anxiety and fear. What's interesting is the story that's not told - the hate crime, the failure of his therapy and recovery, his ex-wife and the extent of his brain damage.

His art and life are virtually inseparable, where he refers to his doll alter-ego as himself, and seems to have an obsessive love for the Barbie characters that interact with his doll-figure. What he would be considered in art terms is an "Untrained artist", or the less popular "Naïve artist", which generally means, as you might imagine, that he's not a trained artist (before his attack, he drew cartoon-y, R. Crumb-y type images, but afterward his hand shook too badly to draw) and that his work is little influenced by current or past artists. The uniqueness of his work stems mainly, as the editor or art magazine Esopus states, from its complete lack of irony, which is generally overwhelming in most work of this nature (including my own!) His earnestness and naïvité extends to his relationships with women, with whom he clearly has some issues. To wit, he creates "staged cat-fights" with the Barbie-doll characters in his bar in his town, going to great lengths to clarify that they are "staged."

What's a bit disturbing is how violent some of the images are, especially as concerns his own attack. In his little town, Nazis attack his character and torture him, similar to his own injuries, and then he exacts horrifying revenge on them. He drags a small tank full of heavily-armed characters with him just about everywhere he goes, and it becomes clear that it's because he's relying on them for protection. Ultimately, his doll character drags along a small-scale doll of his own to deal with his attack by the Nazis.

It's unlikely that this movie is going to be in wide release, but watch out for it in festivals near you. You can also see a fair amount of his photographs on marwencol.com, which also has some clips from the movie.

W00t PWN: Tron Legacy

Despite poor reviews, husband wanted to play the new Tron video game (PS3) because he's... a huge nerd. He said he doesn't really like it (although he keeps playing it???) and that it's mostly just "running and jumping" like "Prince of Persia only in a Tron universe."

It looks a lot like the movie and it's got some dumb bits with er, Kevin Flynn (aka "The Dude-erino") which looks about as realistic as the "young" Flynn in the movie. That was extremely creepy, in an unfortunate uncanny valley kind of way. The voice in the video game is not Jeff Bridges, and I doubt the audience will be fooled regardless of the frequent repetition of the word "man". I happen to think: If you can't get Jeff Bridges, just forget it (man).

Did you ever hear that rumor about how Jeff Bridges' junk was so big that Disney said he had to strap it down lest he offend? This remains unsubstantiated, mainly because Google searches for "Jeff Bridges Giant ___" are overwhelming. (Here you may imagine me spending a good 10 minutes contemplating whether I'm comfortable with my both my parents and current or potential future employers reading various words for male genitalia on my blog. I finally decide to be conservative on the issue.)

Anywho, as far as I can tell, you run around in your neon jumpsuit and occasionally slash at people with your special frisbee. There's some dreamy ambient music, which is fine, but I'm surprised there's not more of the cool Daft Punk score from the movie. It also seems like there'd be more riding of "light cycles" and "recognizers", although M says it's possible there's more of that later in the game.

I find the game Somewhat Tolerable, mostly because it's fairly quiet and inoffensive.

Precious things

I just got back from a visit to see my friend A and her new baby, P. Baby is lovely and I had a nice time snuggling with her and a few days of non-stop chatting and laughing with A in our natural habitat: the couch.

Have a look:
My own little one is posing quite nicely for her own photo sessions lately - isn't this great? It really seems to capture the essence of Kaya (Mainly, boredom and disdain.)

W00t PWN: Left 4 Dead 2

Husband is playing Left 4 Dead 2, "Swamp Fever" a game about 4 people fighting zombies in a hillbilly town. It is quite unpleasant because, aside from the constant rabid-dog snarling of the zombies, the entire game is punctuated by the sound of shot guns and characters shouting "reloading" for no apparent reason.

One plays "co-op" with three other people (which means, you play with 3 other real people and the computer plays the zombies. Some of the zombies explode acid and some seem to be inspired by that Edgar Allan Poe story, The Murders in the Rue Morgue?

When it comes to zombie lore, most people will agree that the zombie's head must be removed, which makes sense because like, the former human is dead, right? The vessel, as it were, is rotting flesh, presumably unreliant on a highly functioning central nervous system, which accounts for the grunting and the lurching walk, amirite? To merely shot them... so what? They're already dead. But, anyway, in Left 4 Dead 2, you just have to shot them a couple of times.

Have you ever noticed how in most zombie stories, blue collar folks are amongst the few remaining humans who must fight the zombies? Never, you know, former art history students. I suppose the blue collar folks are more likely to have guns or, better yet, sickles. I've spent a fair amount of time thinking about what I would do in case of a zombie attack. Option one is to board up my entire house windows and doors and cower inside with husband and cat. Option two is to steal a boat and wait it out in the middle of Lake Michigan (with husband and cat). Or else, I suppose, row up to Canada (surely impervious to zombie attack?). As far as I can tell, those aren't options in Left 4 Dead 2.

M rates this game "pretty fun" and then he shrugged, non-committally. I rate it Quite Unbearable.

W00t PWN: Kinect Adventures

Because I love my husband so very much and because I'm such a fine wife, I got M an Xbox and Kinect for Christmas (xmas=xbox, see?) He was thrilled, and I quite like it too. When you're playing the Kinect, it's like you're Tom Cruise in Minority Report because you don't have to hold a controller or anything, you just move around and it knows what you're doing (something to do with infared friggin' laser beams?)

Kinect comes with a disk called Kinect Adventures! which has like 4 or 5 little games you can play with a friend. The best one is probably River Rush, where you're standing in an innertube raft floating down some rapids and you have to move right and left and jump around. It's very easy but it's fun and not bad exercise. Another game is called 20,000 Leaks, in which you're standing in a small aquarium for some reason and fish are breaking it, and you have to "fix" the leaks by putting your hands or feet over them. It's sounds dumb, but it's fun.

The best part of Kinect Adventures! is that it takes a picture while you're doing this stuff and it's basically the funniest thing you'll ever see. Then you log on to their website and you can download the pics or send them to Facebook. I only wish they were higher quality images because I love them so much I want to make next years Christmas card out of one.

I would rate this game Good Times - it's great because you don't have to practice - you can just start playing - and you can play with a wide age group of people, and no one really wins or loses, which is nice. It's even fun(ny) if you're just sitting there on the couch watching other people play too.

Huck Finn

I wrote about the Huck Finn controversy over on my other blog: check it out!

Grannies

Here are a few more pics from our trip -

M's Gran, happy as a clam with a kitchen job:
These are my grannies. (Grandma J is wearing a sweater that would have been quite a contender in our contest last year!)

And here's a picture that just cracks me all - all the dudes thinking real hard over a game M got for xmas:

sledding

Oh, I meant to post this video with my last post - it's really short but cute!

Nephews

A few days after xmas, my sister and brother came to town with their little monsters and the fun really began. Exchanging presents was complete madness, with all of us lavishing attention on little people we love but don't get to see that often. M and I went slightly overboard and bought nephew #2 a four foot tractor complete with a scooping shovel, and he gratified us by going completely out of his mind, just like we figured he would. While C tried to calm the chaos down by shouting at my dad (aka, Santa), Slower! Slower! and then, in one hilarious outburst, PAUSE! Do you have to poo-poo? M had a different technique, "Don't stop,", he said, "Until everybody's cryin'."


We also went sledding on my parent's gentle slope. That was a good time.

Nephew #2 has the energy of about 3 kid's worth, but just look at that face...

Christmas Recap

M & I went to Indiana on Christmas Eve, where we went to a candle-light service at my parents church, then to my grandma's house, which is an old tradition. Grandma has a tiny little house, which doesn't stop her from inviting over everyone she knows. She rather ingeniously puts boards over her sink and stove piled with food and encourages us to eat heavily.

My cousin C's kid really appreciated our present - he's a sweet kid.

On Christmas Day, M's Mom and Gran came over, as well as my Grandma and Uncle D. We all had a lovely dinner with my mom and dad.


I just like this picture. Do you know my mom put up THREE Christmas trees?

Happy New Year!

On New Year's Eve we went out to dinner with friends and my sister and brother-in-law in Indianapolis, then we went to this hotel party and also spent the night there. The hotel party was a bit silly but still fun. They played all this bizarre 80s hair band music like Pour Some Sugar on Me and Welcome to the Jungle all night, while we were all in the mood for dancing to ... something good. Then this crazy girl tried to get in a fight with us like two minutes before midnight and it was rather alarming. Oh, Indiana!

L asked everyone to tell their favorite moments of 2010 - Cousin C's husband B has been recovering from cancer this year and broke our hearts when he said "any day I wasn't in the hospital". 2011 can only be better for them. (I love you guys!)

M & I had a good year. We both agreed our trip to France was the highlight of the year. (I love you, babe!)
It was great spending a lot of time with my sister over the holiday. My goal was to spend every minute glued to her side and we pretty much did. (I love you, Miss C-illa)
Truthfully, every minute I spend with this guy is my fave - it doesn't matter if we're in France or our back yard. <3