Monday, April 11, 2011

w00t pWn: Assassin's Creed Continues

In case you're wondering why we haven't moved on to a new video game, it's because M can NOT stop playing Assassin's Creed! And, it's been terrible, let me tell you. AND, not only that, but, one day, he DID finish it, and the end was really confusing and lame, but then, what does he do? But he keeps PLAYING it! Now he's playing "multiplayer" and now it's like, he's in Venice, and he and a bunch of other people sneak around and knife folks in the back. It has something to do with Templars and Borgia and some shit.

Demiti Martin has a really funny joke about sneaking.
Important Things with Demetri Martin
Ability - Running a Marathon

M said he has to hand it to the game because they really made sneaking fun. Whatchudo is sneak all over Venice and other people are sneaking too, and maybe you're trying to assassinate the same person or maybe they're trying to assassinate you. Anywho, you gotta sneak real fast behind them and stab them in the back or cut their throat or twist their neck or shove them off a building (seriously!) and when they or you die, it's in grusome detail with slowmo and a splash of blood and and final grunt. I guess I have to hand it to the game too M is so wrapped up in it he can barely answer my questions, and, for once, this game is finally about assassinating people. But, if you ask me, if this many people got assassinated, there'd basically be no one alive in Venice. Here's a snippet of conversation in our house this morning:
K: Hey, why do those guys glow when you come up behind them?
K: Hey, what's that dust ball?
K: I think it's magic.
K: I think that guy just threw some magic dust. Is that what happened?
K: Oh, you're in St. Marco Square!
K: Can you go in the church?
K: Try to go in the church.
M: I'm busy.
K: Woah! What just happened? Do you have magic dust?
M: I shot that guy.
K: You have a GUN?
K: So, you got a new outfit?
K: Hey, that guy's wearing the same outfit as you.
M: Damn it!
K: Oh, that guy just stabbed you in the BUTT!
M: Nah, he just pulled me off the building.
K: Suck.


Indiana Fan said...

OK, this just literally made me laugh out loud. Maybe it's because I can just clearly picture this whole "dialogue" and maybe it's because the phrase "stabbed you in the butt" never stopped being funny - but kudos, nonetheless

d00dpwn1337 said...

I think you're on some magic dust.

KHM said...

This is just soooooo.... Authentic!

Caitlin said...

HILARIOUS! I am still chuckling about butt stabbing. You should ALWAYS review video games.